After last week’s excuse used the rain, I think we should stay on nature, so why don’t we go for the wind. This one is a winner, so if it doesn’t work, you haven’t told it right.

“I am so sorry Sir/Miss (delete as appropriate), but after completing all of my homework to an incredibly high standard, I decided to go out into the garden to show my work to the homework Gods and thank them for their help. As I held the work up to show them, a gust of wind took the paper from my hand and blew it up into very large tree. I thought I would be able to get a ladder and reach the ‘A+’ work, that is until a squirrel sprang out of nowhere and grabbed the work, smiled at me and bounced off to use it as a duvet.”